The Jay Graves Report

How LeBron asks for stupid attention then gets mad when he gets it! “Dang”

"Dang bruh! Why y'all keep askin' me about why I do dumb stuff?"

Chris Bell, the politician, once said, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance. Don’t store unnecessary data, keep an eye on what’s happening, and don’t take unnecessary risks.” Hans Hoffmann, the famous painter, gave it to us like this, “The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.” Then Arthur Wellesley, the 1st Duke of Wellington, broke it down so that it would forever be broken when he spit, “Be discreet in all things, and so render it unnecessary to be mysterious.” 

Well playas…somebody needs to teach LeBron how to be discreet and render it unnecessary to be mysterious because whatever he’s tryin’ to do ain’t workin’. Over the weekend this dun unfollowed the team that he actually plays for on Twitter. Which is no big deal but then on Tuesday when a fake media-type, who was scared to death to even ask him about it finally spit the question out, he tripped. LeBron locked up and said, “Next question.” Then the very next question that came his way he told a boy that he couldn’t think and bounced. 

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! LeBron has over 29 million followers on Twitter. That means that everybody and their baby’s momma’s momma, Ms. Jackson, is watchin’ every move he makes. So you can’t get mad when a boy asks you about why you unfollowed the duns that you actually play for. How are you gettin’ mad when you’re the one pullin’ the unnecessary stunts? 

Remember a few weeks ago when the Cavs had two days off and he ran down to Miami to work out with his boy D Wade? At the time the Cavs were in the middle of team and locker room turmoil and he dips to Miami to hook up with his professional enemy. He does realize that D Wade still plays for the Heat right? Yeah, I know that’s his patna but he was the one that put it on Twitter and then added a freakin’ critic message sayin’, It’s ok to know you’ve made a mistake. Cause we all do at times. Just be ready to live with whatever that comes with it and be with those who will protect you at all cost!” Remember that foolishness bruh? 

Okay so don’t get mad when a boy asks you what the heck you’re doin’ or talkin’ about? That’s like a dun callin’ his wife from his ex-girlfriend’s house and then comin’ home smellin’ like perfume. As soon as he hits the door she drills him with the 20 questions and he gets fired up because ole girl is drillin’ him. Why are you mad bruh? You opened the door to all of the foolishness in the first place!! 

Stop doin’ dumb stuff and boyz won’t be askin’ you ignorant questions about it. And that’s the edited version! Stop me when I start lyin’! 

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific. 

3) Bounced: verb – to leave or leave with an attitude

4) Ms. Jackson: noun – hit record by the rap group OutKast

5) Patna: noun – hood translation for partner or homeboy


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