These NBA boyz will need their butts whooped if they start cryin’ broke now! “Ant Farms”

Y'all better learn from me bruh! Photo: ESPN

Back in March of 2009 Sports Illustrated published an article entitled “How (and Why) Pro Athletes Go Broke” breakin’ down the foolishness of it all. The joint said that by the time a boy has been retired for two years, 78% of former NFL players have gone bankrupt or are under financial stress because of joblessness or divorce. It went on to say that within five years of retirement, an estimated 60% of former NBA players are broke.

Let’s pause like a comma on the NBA players for the purpose of this joint bruh! I better not hear of another NBA dun goin’ broke with the type of bread they’re givin’ out right now. They’re literally givin’ money away in the league. This offseason has been NUTS!! The TV revenues have exploded and salaries are out of this world!

Steph Curry just got 5 years $210 million! John Wall signed a $170 million deal! KYLE LOWRY JUST SIGNED FOR THREE YEARS WORTH $100 MILLION!!! Andre Iguodola is comin’ off of the bench and roped in 3 years at $48 million!! I could go one all day but you get my point!!

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! There are 96 players in the league makin’ $10 million or more for this upcomin’ season alone! There’s only 449 duns playin’! So 21 percent of the league is gettin’ stupid bread!! There are 29 cats gettin’ $20 million or more!! That’s nuts!!!

You have to get all the way down to the 234 highest paid player, Terry Rozier from Boston, to dip under a salary of $2 million per year. However, in the 2018-19 season the dun is goin’ to make $3 million!!!

I saw a comparison of Tim Hardaway Sr. and his son Tim Jr. that completely blew my mind. Tim Sr. played 14 years in the NBA and made a total of $41 million. His son’s been in the league for 4 years and signed a new 4 year deal to make $71 million. Now I’m not hatin’ a boy for gettin’ his bread but duns have to figure out how to keep it now.

I wish a boy would come up broke now talkin’ about Pookie and Ray-Ray was managin’ his money and steered him wrong. You know how boyz start whinin’ after the fact. “Uncle Jr. took my money and was supposed to invest in this ant farm and Pitt Bull Day Care and I haven’t seen him since.” 

Bruh…when you’re gettin’ the type of bread these cats are gettin’ now just put it in the freakin’ bank!! If a dun is gettin’ $26 million per year for 5 years just put in in the bank and live off of 5! Put it in a simple Money Market and get a clean 5 percent return and “Chill” like Guy.

C’mon bruh you don’t need to start a record company when you know nothin’ about the record business. You don’t need to open a freakin’ car wash when there’s a thousand of them in the hood. You don’t need to open a darn barber shop because Man-Man told you he had a dream of ownin’ one. Let Man-Man get his credit straight, go to the bank and get the loan.

And please tell all of the duns in your family that they can pay their own cell phone bills and rent every month. What were they doin’ before you got into the league? Y’all know I’m tellin’ the truth bruh and stop me when I start lying.

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) Guy: noun – 1980’s R&B group that had a hit record called “Let’s Chill”

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!