The Jay Graves Report

LaVar Ball has OFFICIALLY lost his mind with the new ZO2!! “AM LICK”

"Stick 'um up bruh! I'm takin' boyz money out here on GP."

Let the foolishness begin!!! LaVar Ball has completely lost his mind with the Big Baller Brand.  As a matter of fact, that dun has jumped out of the birthday cake butt naked foamin’ at the mouth lookin’ for some suckas to rob in broad daylight. On Thursday ole boy unveiled the ZO2 shoe line designed by his son Lonzo. The main pair that these duns are tryin’ to sell are $495!! They’ve got another pair that have been autographed by Lonzo himself  in the “Wet” color scheme that they’re tryin’ to hustle to boyz for $995. Then they got all the way crazy and put a pair of sandals on the joint for $220!!! Not only is he tryin’ to rob boyz with the ignorant price but he won’t ship until November!

The new ZO2

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! In my mother’s voice, God rest or soul, “Lonzo Ball ain’t played AM LICK of ball in the NBA and he wanna act like he somebody! What!!? I wouldn’t buy his shoes wit yo money!”     

This dun has THEE nerve to put a $495 price tag on a shoe like he’s the GOAT or somethin’!!! Michael Jordan’s most expensive shoe was $400 and he’s considered in most circles as the GOAT!!! What the heck is wrong with LaVar Ball bruh? Then he’s got the audacity to have a boy to sign a pair of shoes and then try to hustle some fool out of $995!!!

Oh and by the way he wants the bread now but he’ll sit on your product until November with no refunds. He’s runnin’ a swap meet bruh! Oh and let me add this piece of foolishness to the puzzle. If you wear size 14 and up it’s goin’ to cost you an extra $200! How many high school basketball players wear shoes smaller than a 14? They aren’t even hustlin’ boyz like that in the street. Where is this cat from?

Well I’ll tell you this, if he finds a sucka to buy a pair for $495 and is willin’ to wait until November to get them he better give ole boy, De’Aaron Fox, from Kentucky $494 of it for handlin’ his butt in the NCAA Tournament back in March. On the biggest stage of Ball’s career he wet the bed as Fox went to work on him. Now he’s got the nerve to be out here tryin’ to get $500 out of a boy? He may as well be sellin’ swamp land in Arizona or palm trees to duns in Chicago.

I see why Nike, Adidas and Under Armour told him to kick rocks. C’mon bruh!! You’re playin’ yourself. The best players in the world don’t have shoes sellin’ for those prices. So who do you think you are that you can charge a boy that kind of bread for a pair of sneakers and tell them to wait until November like he’s Wyclef Jean?

Lonzo Ball hasn’t dribbled a single ball in the NBA. As a matter of fact, that dun hasn’t even taken an NBA shower yet bruh!!! But he wants Big Momma to pay crazy money for a shoe with his name on it? He better take that same $500 and get that broke jumper fixed before he gets into the NBA because otherwise, they’ll be eatin’ the ZO2 for the rest of his life.. How bout that. Stop me when I stop lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) AM: contraction – hood and country for “has not”

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!