The Jay Graves Report

How Penn State proved they were more deservin’ than dull Ohio State! “G’s Up”

Southern California defensive back Adoree' Jackson tackles Penn State running back Saquon Barkley during the first half of the Rose Bowl NCAA college football game Monday, Jan. 2, 2017, in Pasadena, Calif. (AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

Everybody and their baby’s momma’s momma, Ms. Jackson, tried to convince the sports world that Ohio State was more deservin’ of playin’ in the College Football Playoff than the dun that beat them heads up. That they were more deservin’ to play than the dun that actually won the Big Ten championship out right. Well…until reality kicked in the front door like the Feds at Mookie and Ray-Ray nem house at 5:08am on a Monday mornin’.

All of these fake media-types that were sellin’ Ohio State must have been listenin’ to Nikos Kazantzakis, the Greek writer,  when he said, “Since we cannot change reality, let us change the eyes which see reality.” Then both Ohio State and Penn State showed up and actually played in their respective bowl games.

Ohio State looked about like they were supposed to look against Clemson when they got the brakes beaten off of them 31-0 and Penn State went out like some real G’s at a hood house party. They took an “L” but boyz in the hood still respect them this mornin’ because they actually squabbed with the dun tryin’ to take their sneakers.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Penn State was a little shell shocked comin’ out of the gate at the Rose Bowl because not a soul on that team had ever been on a stage that big before. Trace McSorely was so dull out the gate that he threw two picks in their first two possessions and had a boy in a hole early.

However, they calmed and went to work on USC in the second and third quarters. Only problem was, they forgot that they were playin’ an entire game and that the fourth quarter actually counted. USC outscored them 17-0 in the fourth quarter includin’ hittin’ a game winnin’ field goal as time expired to win the joint 52-49! That was one of the most excitin’ Rose Bowls ever played!!

But duns in the media, or more specifically, ESPN, tried to convince you that Ohio State was better and was more deservin’ to play in the playoff and they got their butts skinned alive out in the desert.

Like I’ve been sayin’ for the past few years, if the wins and the losses don’t count then why are we playin’ the games? If the numbers don’t count then why are we keepin’ score? If you want to see the duns that you think looks better in a bathin’ suit then let’s pick the teams after spring ball is over.

However, if you wanna see the duns that actually deserve to play in the College Football Playoff then let’s settle it on the field. Now I’m not sayin’ that Penn State was better than Clemson or would have beaten Dabo and Co. But what I am sayin’ is that they were more deservin’ to get beaten by Clemson than Ohio State’s dull undeservin’ butt was!!

Like I told you boyz on New Year’s Day in the ridiculously Hot Joint entitled “Game” ,ESPN is playin’ you cats for suckas with the whole College Football Playoff anyway. There was absolutely nothin’ wrong with the BSC because it put No.1 verses No.2 in the title game every year. Just like the College Football Playoff without the waste of time of the darn blowout semifinal games. The only problem was that Fox owned the BCS and ESPN couldn’t get paid off of it.

Now the “Playoff” is the greatest thing since Jehri Curls and penny loafers because ESPN owns the foolishness!! The only problem is, the games had to be played and there was no runnin’ away from the reality of who DESERVED to play in the playoff. And please don’t get it twisted, at the end of the season there wasn’t a team playin’ better than USC but they didn’t deserve to get into the playoff  because they didn’t win their conference just like dull Ohio State. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Ms. Jackson: noun – rap song by the group OutKast

2) Nem: pronoun – hood vernacular for “and them”

3) Spit: verb – to say

4) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

5) Squabbed: verb – to fight

6) Dull: adjective – to describe something as bein’ terrible, something that makes you sick with disgust because it’s so stupid to even think of.