CLUELESS, NEW YORK — Now that the ink has dried on Odell Beckham Jr.’s contract I can safely say that the New York Giants have lost their freakin’ minds payin’ that dun that type of bread. In case you’ve been under a rock since Monday they’ve agreed to pay ole boy $95 million with $65 million guaranteed.
Now look here playa, I’m never goin’ to hate on a boy for gettin’ his money because that’s the name of the game. Get the bag and keep it movin’!!! However, Odell Beckham Jr. can’t keep it movin’ because he’s way too emotional to trust with that type of bread.
Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! I’ve been sittin’ around for the past four days listenin’ to cats on the radio and boyz that actually cover the NFL talkin’ crazy and reckless. I’ve heard these cats sayin’ that ODB was the best wide receiver they’ve ever seen. I’ve heard duns say that he’s the most talented receiver to ever play the game like they were just born last week.
First of all playa, pump ya brakes! Odell Beckham Jr. got the bag not all of the talent. Stop actin’ like Randy Moss, Jerry Rice, Terrell Owens and Cris Carter weren’t ever born. He’s good and just happened to come along when boyz were willin’ to pay this type of bread to a player.
Back to my original point, Beckham is way too emotional to trust with a bag of that size with that much guaranteed bread. There isn’t a defensive back in the NFL that’s not gunnin’ for him right now. Every dun that lines up against him, talented or not, will start pushin’ his buttons on Tuesday of game week. They’ll be talkin’ $100 worth of noise to him and by game day they’ll be all in his head. Then as soon as the whistle blows to start the game they’ve started pushin’ ole boy around, gettin’ under his skin, takin’ cheap shots at him just to get him fired up.
Don’t think for one minute that Jalen Ramsey isn’t already comin’ up with a plan to rattle that dun on September 9th Week 1 at 1:00pm. Odell may not make it through Game 1 without havin’ a fit.
The next thing you know ODB is cryin’ and fightin’ with the kicker’s net because he’s been ejected from the game because he can’t control his emotions. And guess what playa, that $95 million with $65 million is sittin’ on the sideline cryin’ too. It makes absolutely no sense to pay that dun that type of bread.
Let me put it where the goats can get it, “Money is like alcohol. It doesn’t change you, it just brings out what’s already in you.” If he was an overly emotional mess without the $95 million he’s goin’ to be a stark ravin’ mess with the $95 million. Stop me when I start lyin’!
Playas Thesaurus:
1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.
2) Put it where the goats can get it: verb phrase – to make it as elementary as possible. To put it at ground level so everyone can understand it.
3) Ole boy: noun – the person that I’m currently talkin’ about.
The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”