The Jay Graves Report

Why Tennessee’s Butch Jones couldn’t just remove ole boy for flippin’ Bama the bird! “Pockets”

This is a finger but it isn't the joint Rashaan Gaulden showed the Alabama student section bruh! Photo: BRIANNA PACIORKA/NEWS SENTINEL

On Saturday durin’ the massive beat down that Alabama was puttin’ on Tennessee. This dun playin’ defensive back for the Volunteers named Rashaan Gaulden jumped completely out of the birthday cake butt naked foamin’ at the mouth flippin’ a double bird to the Crimson Tide student section. After a 97 yard interception returned for a touchdown by his teammate, when the game was clearly out of hand, ole boy runs into the end zone with birds a blazin’!

Bruh..at the time of this foolishness they were already down three touchdowns and hadn’t scored a touchdown in 12 quarters. But he had this to say about his reckless behavior after the game.

“There was just a lot of frustration that led up to that. I just know that that’s not how my parents raised me. They raised me to be grounded, humble. I just feel really bad for disrespecting them and the University of Tennessee and Alabama, as well, for doing that.”

Okay let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Will somebody please tell me why ole boy was feelin’ frustrated gettin’ the brakes beaten off of them at Alabama bruh? It’s not like Alabama snuck up on them and beat them silly. It’s Alabama!! It’s been on the schedule all year. Tennessee came in with a record of 3-4 with their coach havin’ the Hot Pockets and they can’t score on a call girl in Vegas! However, he’s sittin’ here tellin’ boyz that he got frustrated that the best team in America was blastin’ them? Give me a break!!

You actin’ a fool because you’re accustomed to actin’ to fool!! You didn’t just pull those birds outta yo butt! If I were Butch Jones I would have removed him from my sideline immediately and had him waitin’ on me in the locker room after the game. He didn’t deserve to even finish the game on the sideline with his teammates. That type of behavior is completely unacceptable.

If I would have pulled a stunt like that with my daddy sittin’ in the stands. By the time I got to the sideline he would have been waitin’ for me with his underwear pulled up to his nipples mad bruh, with his belt in his hand. And I already know what he would have said, “Since you wanna embarrass me! Ima embarrass yo very dark skinned tail!” And that’s the edited version.

These duns now days aren’t afraid of anybody at the crib. That’s the problem!! You’ve got to be afraid of your father or if daddy ain’t around Big Momma, Uncle LeRoy, Aunt LuLu or somebody bruh. Somebody’s gotta be willin’ to stand on that sideline with their underwear touchin’ their nipples mad.

When there are no consequences at the crib for pullin’ stunts like that then you get foolishness like this. If Butch Jones wasn’t runnin’ around with the “Hot Pockets” right now he’d suspend that dun for a week or two. However, since he’s losin’ ole boy will be on the field startin’ next week.

Let a fool try that nonsense with ole Nick Saban though. He’ll be sittin’ in the student section the rest of the season. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) Ole boy: noun – the person that I’m currently talkin’ about.

3) Hot Pockets: verb phrase – on the verge of being fired, the hot seat

4) Crib: noun – at home

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!

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