The Jay Graves Report

OJ Simpson caught the media slippin’ and dipped like a dun leavin’ the mill! “Outta Here”

O.J. Simpson signs papers as he prepares to leave prison in Nevada. Photo: Lovelock Correctional Facility

A dun named Orenthal James walked away a free man Sunday mornin’ from the Lovelock Correctional Facility at 12:08pm Pacific time. Ole boy slipped away like a, well, a thief in the night in a full jean suit and white sneakers lookin’ like an old cat on his way to play bingo down at the lodge.

What was so smooth was that boyz pulled a fast one on the media. They finally caught them sleepin’. All week O.J.’s lawyer and others close to the situation told the media that he would be released this week. However, releasin’ ole boy on Sunday would be highly unlikely because of a lack of staff at the prison. There was a window of about 6 days that they were able to release him. However, they were like, the earliest we can let this dun go the better.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! They didn’t want boyz camped out in front of their place all week with this foolishness. They’ve got a prison to run. So they let a boy go within eight minutes of the designated time of eligible release.

OJ Simpson walked outta that joint like he was gettin’ off work at the steel mill. The correctional officer was like, “Come on!” the dun walkin’ him out was like “Bye Mr. Simpson.” OJ was like “Okay!” and in other words “Aight deuces!,” jumped in the hooptie and dipped.

The media was caught with their pants down like a boy usin’ the toilet at a Mike Tyson fight. He’s in mid stream when the knock out punch occurs and everybody starts screamin’. He can’t finish fast enough. Too late.

What blew my mind were the comments of Florida’s Attorney General Pam Bondi. Ole girl said this in a statement. “The specter of his residing in comfort in Florida should not be an option. Our state should not become a country club for this convicted criminal.”

Bruh…if the law allows for him to move to Florida after his release then you have no control over where he decides to live, or your opinion of where he can and cannot live. You sound crazy because there are all types criminals livin’ in Florida. All reports now say that he will live in a gated community in Las Vegas until his paperwork is processed for him to go to Florida. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) Ole boy: noun – the person that I’m currently talkin’ about.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!