The Jay Graves Report

Dan Gilbert actually forgot who the Cavs were tryin’ to low ball Chauncey Billups! “Butt Naked Trippin'”

"You're Jay, I royally screwed up this time bruh!" Photo: Ezra Shaw/Getty Images

Dan Gilbert has completely forgotten who the Cleveland Cavaliers actually are. The recent success of his franchise, on the surface, has this dun feelin’ himself so he’s out here butt naked trippin’ on boyz now. Just before the draft he let one of the best general managers in the league, David Griffin, walk because he didn’t want to pay the man what he was worth to do his freakin’ job. Then a fews days ago he low balled Chauncey Billups and let him get away.

Ole boy initially offered Billups $1.5 million for a job that typically starts at $4 million. The Lakers just paid their new general manager, Rob Pelinka with no experience, $5 million! C’mon Dan Gilbert! Really? Do you really need for me to break you down?

Well…let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Cleveland hit the freakin’ lottery not once but three times bruh. It’s like gettin’ struck by lightenin’ three times. Thirty-two years ago they hit the first time because the best all-around basketball player on the planet was born in Akron. In 2003 the Cavs just happened to have the worse team in the league sittin’ on the first overall pick in the draft and the kid was draft eligible. So they hit for the second time.

That Philistine took some bums to the Finals as a 22 year old and got swept by a much better San Antonio team. He carried the franchise until it got stupid, decided to dip after seven years of foolishness and terrible management. The team once again became one of the worse in the league for four consecutive years.

For some strange reason the dun had a love affair with Cleveland even after Dan Gilbert and the fans treated him like trash when he exercised his right to free agency four years before. So they hit the lottery for the third time, the dun came back and within’ two years he delivered an NBA title to a city and franchise that had NEVER sniffed a championship in basketball prior to that.

Now Gilbert is actin’ like the Cavs can disrespect boyz and not pay them to do their jobs. The only reason they’re even relevant is because LeBron was born in the area and loves Northeast Ohio. If you take him off of that team they’re instantly trash and would be one of the worse teams in the league overnight.

Don’t get it twisted playboy, Kyrie is there as a result of LeBron leavin’  in 2010 and the Cavs havin’ the first overall pick in 2011. In 2012 they picked up Dion Waiters with the 4th overall pick and they got Anthony Bennett in 2013 with the first overall pick again!! In 2014 they were back at the top of the draft with Andrew Wiggins!!! So without LeBron they were essentially the worse team in the freakin’ league just like they were before the dun arrived in the NBA in 2003.

Now Ole Dan wants to start low ballin’ boyz not realizin’ that Lebron has signed a short term deal that will allow him to dip after next season. Gilbert’s played both Griffin, Billups and himself all at the same time bruh. There’s no way now that LeBron is stayin’ after the 2018 season. When ownership is trippin’ and won’t even pay the GM that’s a problem. Remember in 2010 they fired Mike Brown and Danny Ferry, the GM, quit two weeks later. Then LeBron dipped, which he should have because the situation was stupid.

What these owners and front office cats don’t realize is that the players have all of the leverage now bruh. Lebron has taught all of these boyz how to sign the short term deal to keep the leverage and it’s workin’.

Big Momma used to always say, “When people tell you who they are! You better listen to them.” Gilbert told LeBron who he was in 2010 when he wrote that disrespectful letter to him after he took his talents to South Beach. He should have known then that this cat was out of his mind.

Sorry Cavs fans but you’ve got until this time next year to be relevant and after that it’s a wrap. You’re about to fall off of a cliff never to be seen or heard of again and you can thank your dull owner for that foolishness. Hopefully you can get struck by lightenin’ a fourth time with a boy bein’ born in Cleveland that will become the best player on the planet. But you can hold your breath on that foolishness because it ain’t gonna happen. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) Dip: verb – to leave

3) Dull: adjective – to describe something as bein’ terrible, something that makes you sick with disgust because it’s so stupid to even think of.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!