The Jay Graves Report

Why boyz sound crazy sayin’ today’s NBA players are soft and can’t play! “Knobs”

"We won't even get ejected for this bruh! I know, that's why I got you by the throat!" Photo: NBA file photo

Benjamin Franklin once said, “Being ignorant is not so much a shame, as being unwilling to learn.” H.L. Mencken, the well-known journalist, gave it to us like this, “I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave. And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.” Then Grantland Rice, the early 20th century sports writer, which sounds like a triple O.G. from the G, broke it down like this, “A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows the public opinion.”

Well playas…ignorant people talk more than intelligent folks and they make the most noise too. Public opinion among old heads is that these young boyz playin’ in the NBA now are soft and that they can’t play. All week the ESPN 30 for 30 has been on about the Lakers/Celtics rivalry called the “Best of Enemies”  where boyz were not only bein’ physical but they were down right clotheslinin’ each other and scrappin’.

So as a result, I hear boyz makin’ ignorant statements like, “These cats now days couldn’t have played 30 years ago because they’re too soft and aren’t as good. They can’t take a hard foul and these duns complain too much.”

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! First of all playa, I’m considered an old head and I’m watchin’ the same freakin’ NBA that you’re watchin’ and I watched the same NBA that you keep referrin’ to! Stop livin’ in the past because you sound crazy! These young cats are bigger, stronger and faster than the cats you keep hollerin’ about and they’re better players than the duns that played 30 years ago. Stop it! You sound crazy!

Back 30 years ago kids only played basketball durin’ basketball season! Now they play year around. These young thunder cats have played more basketball now by the time they graduate high school than a dun that played 3 years of college 30 years ago. If a boy is in the NBA now he’s been playin’ year-round basketball since he was freakin’ 7! What are you talkin’ about? And he can do far more on the court than most duns that played 30 years ago.

To say that a boy can’t play because he doesn’t have the same post-game as let’s say Kareem or Hakeem is stupid. Why? Because all Kareem and Hakeem could do was play on the blocks. They were specialists in the paint. They couldn’t play anywhere else on the floor. Let me put it where the goats can get it playa. They were like an Endocrinologist bruh! They only specialized in a few things. They would rebound the ball, stand there and wait for a guard to pass it to and then get to the block and that’s where they stayed on EVERY single possession.

These young cats, let’s take Anthony Davis for example, are like an Internal Medicine physician. He knows a little bit about everything. He can rebound the rock, push the rock, score on the blocks, and on the perimeter. Now the Endocrinologist is the specialist when you need some specific help at solvin’ a problem like hormone imbalances or diabetes. However, in this game of basketball today you’d rather have the dun on the floor that’s an Internist that can do a little of everything because the game moves so fast. The game has changed from what it was 30 years ago. You can’t play man to man like you did back then. So you need a boy that can do more at his position. That doesn’t make the players unable to play because the game is different. In this day and age if a boy can do only one thing he’s considered a “limited” player.

 OK, I lost all of my simple minded individuals with the Endo/Internist analogy. Let me break it down in food terms playa because we all gotta eat right? If we’re about to get together with the fellas to watch the game would you rather go to the hamburger joint or the spot that sells burgers, wings and dogs? That’s what these young boyz are now in the NBA.
 What these cats are capable of doin’ now we’ve never seen before. Outside of Zeke, Magic and the Big ‘O name me a guard with better skills than what we’re seein’ from cats like CP3, Young Russ, Mike Conley, Kyrie, Steph Curry etc. that played 30 years ago? Name me a big that could not only play on the block but on the perimeter 30 years ago? You can’t! Can you imagine Anthony Davis (yes he’s a power forward) just happenin’ to match up with a dun like Kareem or Hakeem in the blocks on a humbug like boyz tend to do now?
He’d get destroyed in the paint but then he’ll take both of those duns out on the perimeter and destroy them because he can shoot and handle the rock. Just because a boy plays a different game now doesn’t mean that he can’t play. Darn near everybody in the league can dribble now. Bigs couldn’t walk and chew gum 30 years ago. Take them off the block and their like fish out of water. Stop it! You sound crazy!

We aren’t even goin’ to talk about the athleticism of the small forward in today’s game vs. 30 years ago. It’s a waste of time because the small forward may as well be a guard now. So let’s keep it movin’!

 Will somebody please tell me who Charles Barkley is gonna guard at the power forward position today at 6’4″? They listed him at 6’6″ but that dun ain’t 6’6″ bruh? He might be 6’5″ with some of Howard Hewett’s high heel shoes on but that dun ain’t 6’6″.  Dirk, LaMarcus Aldridge, Blake Griffin, Anthony Davis, Chris Bosh and Kevin Love play on the perimeter, dribble and shoot! And they’re all 6’10” bruh! Again, you sound stupid and crazy tellin’ me that these boyz can’t play today.

What completely shatters my brain matter is the dun that sits up and says, “These young boyz are soft because they can’t take a hard foul! These cats couldn’t have played with duns like Laimbeer, Bird and Barkley because they used to fight all of the time! If you came in the paint you might get cold cocked!” What!!!??

You sound like a fool butt naked foamin’ at the mouth! Back then a boy could literally fire on a cat drivin’ the paint or pull a Dick Butkus clothesline on ’em and it was only considered a foul. So if it’s only a foul then it made sense to try to get away with that foolishness. Now it’s a Flagrant 2, an ejection, a possible fine and a boy could possibly get suspended for the next game.  It’s not called bein’ soft it’s called bein’ smart.

Boyz are complainin’ about hard fouls because hard fouls are against the freakin’ rules now! That’s like some old timer tellin’ me that I’m soft because I wear a freakin’ seat belt. “Man you soft! Back in my day nobody wore a seat belt!” That’s why duns were dyin’ in car accidents at a higher clip you idiot! When you know better you do better. Everybody was smokin’ cigarettes back in your day too.

It kills me when cats wanna live in the past. You hear these fools sayin’ that it was better back in the day. No it wasn’t! It’s never been better than it is right now!! It wasn’t better when a toddler could get in the car and stand up in the front seat while his old girl was driven. It wasn’t better when TV went off at midnight. Remember when the national anthem would come on and then the TV would literally start snowin’ and it wouldn’t come back on until 6am. And you only had 5 channels back then. Now you’ve got 500! How was it better back in the day?

Remember when a boy literally had to go to the freakin’ library to do a research paper and it took a freakin’ month to do it and then you had to type it. God forbid you made a mistake. You had to tear up the page and start all over! Now you’ve got the internet and you can find whatever you need in 30 seconds and if you’re typin’ something and make a mistake you can hit the backspace button.

I can pull a darn phone out of my pocket right now and call a boy wherever I am or if I don’t wanna talk to him I can send him a text. Back in the day I had to pull over and use a nasty pay phone or wait until I got to the crib to call him and God forbid that dun wasn’t at home. How was that better?

I can start my freakin’ car without even bein’ in it, turn the radio and air on and heat the freakin’ seats so that the joints are ready for me when I decide to get in it. Remember when you had to roll your windows down or pay an arm and a leg for power windows. They used to sell cars without AC bruh!!!! What are you talkin’ about! Stop it! You sound crazy tellin’ me that it was better back in the day and that goes for basketball too.

You didn’t have duns that could play multiple positions durin’ the course of a game. Magic was like the only cat that could do that. Stop it! I love seein’ a dun like KD at 6’10” handlin’ the rock, pushin’ that joint and shootin’ the lights out of the gym. Dirk at 7’ playin’ out on the perimeter and givin’ boyz the business. With some of these cats you have a hard time rememberin’ what position they actually play because they play all over the floor all night. Stop tellin’ me that boyz are soft because you don’t wanna put down the record player and VCR.

You’re still the dun waitin’ on the oven to warm up while everybody else is eatin’ because they warmed their food up in the microwave. Go sit yo butt down somewhere, take off those played out Stacy Adams knobs and stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:

1) Triple O.G.: noun – an old school gangsta, in other words the old cat in the barber shop that gives all the young boyz street knowledge.
2) The G: noun – my home town of Gary, In. the home of the original gangsta.
3) Old heads: noun – anybody 40 years old 40 is considered an old head by these young boyz.
4) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc.
5) Young Thunder Cats: noun – just another word for young boyz.