The Jay Graves Report

The Ball Brothers would have been better off signin’ with the Delaney Projects Playground All-Americans!

"Will somebody please stop this man. He's lost his mind bruh!" Photo: JAYNE KAMIN-ONCEA/GETTY IMAGES

Big Momma always said, “Be careful what you ask for because you just might get it!” Well playas…ole big mouth LaVar Ball got exactly what he was askin’ for on Monday afternoon. Both of his sons LiAngelo and LaMelo were signed to professional basketball contracts. The problem is, they signed with the Lithuanian team Prienu Vytautas.

They may as well have signed with the Siberian beach volleyball team or the Jamaican bobsled team for the amount of people that will actually care that they’re over there playin’. How bout this bruh, instead of goin’ over there to play I can make a call to get them on the Delaney Projects Playground All-American team to roll around the country to play boyz from Any Hood, USA.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! I’ve probably got more money in my pocket than the team has right now bruh! From all accounts the organization is strugglin’ financially and because they don’t have the bread they barely even practice. The coach doesn’t speak an ounce of English but LaVar is goin’ to send his 16 year old child over there to hoop.

They’ve already told the duns that they probably won’t see any playin’ time when the team plays in the Lithuanian (LKL) League. However, they would get some PT when the team plays in the lesser competitive leave called the Baltic League that they also play in. Boyz are lookin’ at about 20-25 minutes of action in that foolishness.

Oh did I mention that the arena these duns play in only hold 1,700 people and 500 of those seats are reserved for sponsors that really don’t pay enough bread for them to practice everyday let alone play competitive basketball in the Lithuanian League.

So let’s put it where the goats can get it bruh. LaVar has taken his son out of UCLA, one of the blue blood programs in college basketball, that play in front of packed houses every night and on television. A program that will probably make a run in the NCAA Tournament to play in front of millions to send a dun to play in the middle of nowhere.

He’s taken his youngest child out of high school and the comfortable confines of home, his mother and the fact that he was the big man on campus where EVERYBODY knew his name. LaVar sent him to the middle of nowhere to play for a coach that can’t even communicate with him and he’s probably not goin’ to get very much playin’ time.

You wanted it playboy, now you’ve got it. All you were concerned with was them hoopin’ professionally so now you can check that foolishness off of the list. Now what? Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

2) Put it where the goats can get it: verb phrase – to make it as elementary as possible. To put it at ground level so everyone can understand it.

3) Ole boy: noun – the person that I’m currently talkin’ about.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!

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