CLEVELAND, OH — Mid-way through the fourth quarter Big Momma finally gets a run in her stocking as LeBron decides that it wasn’t worth runnin’ up and down the floor anymore. His Cavs strip the Toronto Raptors butt naked leavin’ a boy with only his pimp socks and street shoes 128-93 to sweep them 4-0. They’ve beaten these cats three straight times in the playoffs and LeBron has beaten them 10 straight times. Wheredeydodatat?
The Cavs got out of the ride shootin’ like some gangstas in the projects drivin’ an old school Deuce and a Quarter. They were knockin’ ‘um down at 77 percent from the field and 50 percent from behind the arc at the 2:52 mark of the first quarter. It was over before it got started good bruh.
JR Smith started the night 5-5 from the field and 2-2 from three-point range drop droppin’ 12 of his 15 points in the first quarter. The dun finished shootin’ 100 percent for the night goin’ 6-6 from the field and 3-3 from behind the arc. At the end of one the Cavs were up 30-26 with LeBron scorin’ only 2 points.
The Raptors looked like they wanted to show some heart when Jonas Valanciunas went to work on Cleveland as the second quarter started. The dun comes out of the bushes and puts up a quick 10 points and playin’ hella defense.
However, the Cavs went on a 12-0 run to close out the half goin’ up 63-47. It was over at that point bruh! You could have really walked outta of the joint or turned your television off at that point.
LeBron went into the break with 10 points, 7 assists and 6 rebounds. However, the dun finished with 29 points, 11 assists and 8 rebounds.
All five starters for the Cavs finished the night in double figures to get rid of these cats with ease.
Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! The Raptors should be ashamed of themselves goin’ out there wettin’ the bed like I said that they would. I told boyz goin’ into Game 1 that if they lose the openin’ game to an exhausted LeBron that the series would be over. Not only did they lose that game but they ended up gettin’ swept.
And will somebody please tell me where DaMar DeRozan went bruh? That dun took a smoke break and never came back. That’s a darn shame.
Now the Cavs will get some much needed rest because Boston allowed Philly to get a win on Monday night to extend their series to 3-1. Now it looks like Boston will get a rested Cleveland team showin’ up this weekend. It should be fun to watch and you can stop me when I start lyin’!
Playas Thesaurus:
1) Wheredeydodatat: Hood for “Who does that?”
2) Deuce and a Quarter: noun – the old school Buick Electra 225
3) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.
4) Ole boy: noun – the person that I’m currently talkin’ about.
The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”
The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!