Kyrie Irving has OFFICIALLY jumped out of the birthday cake butt naked foamin’ at the mouth and has requested a trade! Ole boy is ready to dip from Cleveland. I guess he’s tryin’ to get out of dodge before LeBron pulls a vanishin’ act on him like he did on D. Wade. Because you already know that dun isn’t goin’ to tell a boy what he’s about to do before he does it.
Remember when LeBron flew all the way back to Miami on the same private jet from Las Vegas with his so-called best friend and didn’t tell him that he was bouncin’ from the Heat until it actually happened? Remember when he asked Wade and Bosh to opt out of the guaranteed contracts they had already signed to figure out how they were goin’ to put the roster together? Wade, on bad knees, put a 2 year deal worth $42 million back on the table and ole boy took off to Cleveland on him? Remember that? And Wade was only able to recoup $31 million of it? Remember that?
So Kyrie is like, hey playa I’m outta here before this dun starts actin’ funny. What’s so crazy is that it proves a point I made several years ago. There’s only one cat in the car that literally has somewhere to go and that’s LeBron!!!
I wrote a Hot Joint entitled “Diamonds” that talked about the pressure of bein’ LeBron! He’s the only cat in the history of the league that has the pressure of havin’ to win a title EVERY time he steps on the floor. No other players has ever played with that type of pressure. Not Kareem, Mike, Wilt, Bill Russell, Kobe, NOBODY!!!
Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! There isn’t a player on the Cavs, includin’ Kyrie, that has to win anything else for the rest of their careers and nobody would care. That’s why Kyrie isn’t trippin’ about dippin’! He’s got nowhere else to go because he’s already overachieved in life bruh. Just like the duns LeBron was playin’ with down in Miami. Once they won the ship boyz took their feet off of the gas because nobody expected any of them to win anything when they got to the league anyway.
Think about it bruh. Kyrie went from playin’ on one of the worse teams in the league for 4 years. Now he’s gone to three straight Finals and won one. There’s no pressure on him to win anything else so it’s easy to ask for a trade even if he ends up in a trash situation like the Knicks.
You would think that Uncle Drew would at least play through next season because they’re a shoe in to get back to the Finals because they’re playin’ in the East and whatever team LeBron is on is goin’ to the Finals bruh. Especially comin’ out of the East.
Sure, I know that Kyrie doesn’t want to get stuck in Cleveland after LeBron leaves because ole boy’z definitely leavin’ now that Dan Gilbert has sabotaged the team by not keepin’ David Griffin and tryin’ to low ball Chauncey Billups. There’s no reason for either of them to stay at this point.
League sources have hollered at ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski and told him that possible landin’ spots for Kyrie were the Spurs, Knicks, Heat and Timberwolves. Let’s pause like a comma right there real quick bruh. The Spurs ain’t givin’ up multiple good pieces for Kyrie. Why? Because they don’t need him to get back to the Western Conference finals. If Kawhi doesn’t go down last year they give Golden State a run for their money. They still lose but they make it more competitive and Pop is still the best coach in the league.
My point is proven about a boy not havin’ any pressure to win titles when he says I’ll consider even playin’ for the dysfunctional Knicks. Do I need to say anything else bruh? Does it make any sense to go to Minnesota or Miami when you can stay in Cleveland and get right back to the Finals? That’s if it’s about winnin’? Obviously it’s not about winnin’! Otherwise, the dun would sit tight for at least another year because goin’ anywhere else decreases his chances of even gettin’ to the conference finals.
It only makes sense if you’ve got nothin’ else to prove and nobody’s goin’ to care whether you win or lose for rest of your career. Nobody’s trippin’ that D. Wade isn’t goin’ to the Finals! Nobody cared last season that Norris Cole wasn’t even in the freakin’ league. He was playin’ for the Shandong Golden Stars last year and there wasn’t an ounce of pressure on him. Why? Because nobody cares unless it’s LeBron!!!
If Kyrie ends up in Philly for the next 10 years nobody’s goin’ to care two dead flies smashed if he never makes the playoffs again. It must be great to be able to play without pressure to win and because of that you can ask to be traded from the best team in the East to teams that don’t have a shot and nobody blinks.
In other words playboy, Kryie would rather be the man on a garbage team (Cause he ain’t goin’ to San Antonio cuz they ain’t crazy) than be a role player on a team that will have an opportunity to play for a title. Stop me when I start lyin’!
Playas Thesaurus:
1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.
2) Dip: verb – to leave
The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”
The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!