The Jay Graves Report

Why Mike Tomlin needs to let Joey Porter go bruh! “Survival Instincts”

"Don't bring any problems my way bruh!"

Benjamin Franklin once said, “We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.” Bohidharama gave it to us like this, “The ignorant mind, with its infinite afflictions, passions, and evils, is rooted in the three poisons. Greed, anger, and delusion.” Then Galileo Galilei spit some serious fire when he said, “I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn’t learn something from him.”

Well playas…Galileo can certainly learn somethin’ from Joey Porter! Don’t be an idiot!!! On Sunday after the Pittsburgh Steelers beat the brakes off of the Miami Dolphins 30-12 this dun went out and got arrested. He was formally charged with aggravated assault, simple assault, resistin’ arrest, public drunkenness and terroristic threats! That’s all accordin’ to the Pittsburgh Police Department.

At about 9:30pm the dun shows up at a spot called The Flats on the south side of Pittsburgh. A bouncer by the name of Jon Neskow told him that he couldn’t get in because the last time he was there he threatened to kill him. So when he told Joey to kick rocks ole boy got fired up and lunged at him. An off-duty cop tried to push him back. Here’s what the cop wrote in the report,

“I placed my hands on Porter’s chest to prevent him from advancing back towards Neskow. Porter grabbed both of my wrists, pushing them back towards me. Porter’s grasp was so strong and he was holding my wrists so tightly that I could not pull them away from him, no matter how hard I tried. Porter was extremely agitated and after my observations of him grabbing Neskow and now grabbing me, I believed that he was going to cause me serious injury.”

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Joey Porter is a freakin’ assistant coach for the Pittsburgh Steelers not a darn player!! And that’s the edited version. He’s out here wildin’ out like he’s 22 years old. Apparently the bouncer was tellin’ the truth about him threatenin’ him because Porter tried to get at him. But again he’s a darn coach not a player out here actin’ a fool.

The last thing Mike Tomlin needs is to have to deal with some foolishness goin’ into next week’s divisional game against Kansas City. It’s playoff time bruh! It’s all hands on deck! Not all hands out in the street fightin’ bouncers and police! What’s wrong with this cat? What kind of example is he settin’ for the young boyz on the team?

Mike Tomlin needs to relieve him of his duties ASAP and keep it movin’ bruh. Unfortunately, Tomlin won’t get the same breaks that his colleagues will get durin’ his career. He won’t get the passes that his white counterparts get. He can’t make mistakes or have 15 losin’ seasons like Jeff Fisher had and keep his job. In other words, he can’t have duns on his staff out here fightin’ policemen and bouncers and think that boyz are gonna just sweep it under the rug. He doesn’t get that luxury.

So when duns pull those types of stunts it’s every man for himself playboy. Mike’s gotta look out for Mike! So if I were Mike, I’d drop that dun like a bad habit. He didn’t just act a fool in the season bruh! He showed his butt in the middle of a playoff run!! That’s a fireable offense. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

 The caption under the photo isn’t real but it’s REAL talk!