The Jay Graves Report

Why Jordan fans will never cut LeBron a break despite doin’ the impossible! “Rabbit’s Feet”

"MAAAAAN!!!"

Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm.” William Feather gave it to us like this, “Most of us regard good luck as a betrayal of that right.” Then Joseph Heller broke it down like a hooptie in the projects sittin’ on 24’s when he said, “Destiny is a good thing to accept when it’s going your way. When it isn’t, don’t call it destiny, call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.”

Well playas…call it whatever you want but it ain’t good. Kyrie Irving is out for the remainder of the Finals with a fractured knee cap. This leaves LeBron in the middle of what could have been a great street fight with a water gun and some firecrackers. LeBron James has gotta have the worst luck in the history of the NBA bruh! This dun keeps showin’ up to the Finals by himself and everybody and their momma’s momma expects him to be able to win because Jordan showed up and went 6-0 with much better teams.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! LeBron’s been to the Finals 6 times! He’s won 2 of them and has already lost 3. In 2 (2007 and 2014) of the 3 that he’s lost he was carryin’ some bums in on his coat tail. Yes!!!! He carried the Heat to the Finals in 2014! D. Wade’s knees were shot and Chris Bosh pulled a no show in two of the 5 games not scorin’ a single point! In the 2011 Finals that dun completely fell apart in multiple 4th quarters in that series. Maybe he couldn’t get over the fact that boyz were hollerin’ about Delonte West hangin’ out with his momma. Whatever the reason playboy I can’t help him on that. He fell apart and Jordan never did nor would he even if it were true.

But when you look at this dun’s luck with supportin’ casts in the Finals it’s almost Schleprock-ish but boyz don’t give him credit for showin’ up to the Finals with cats that no one else could even make it out of the first round with.

USA Today’s Jason McIntyre did a Crazy Hot Joint this week entitled “LeBron Has Had Much Weaker Supporting Cast than Jordan” comparin’ the supportin’ casts of LeBron and Jordan in the Finals and they were polar opposite’s bruh. Ole boy ranked all of teams that have made the Finals datin’ back to 1985. That’s 31 years for all of you simple minded individuals. So usin’ the metrics based on leverage and minutes-weighed statistical plus/minus talent for the best players teammates through the conference finals accordin’ to McIntyre; he concluded that LeBron’s supportin’ cast ranks 3 of the worst 8 and Jordan’s ranks 3 of the best 6 out of 62 teams!

I wrote a joint last week entitled “The Edited Version” tellin’ you boyz the same thing without the science because I’m not as smart. Jordan had the best 3-point man from a percentage stand point in Steve Kerr at 45 percent which is better than Steph’s 44 percent right now, the best wing man and defender in Scottie Pippen, the best rebounder in the game at the time in Dennis Rodman and the freakin’ best coach to ever walk the sidelines. He should have gone 6-0 in the Finals as I explained to boyz in my Hot Joint entitled “The Edited Version” earlier this week.

Lebron needs an old school rabbit foot bruh! He drug some bums to the Finals in 2007 at only 22 years old and played against the 11th best team of those 62 ole boy mentioned earlier and his team was the 2nd worst to make the Finals since 1985. The dull 1999 Knicks led by Larry Johnson and 36 years Patrick Ewing was the worst. I already told you about the 2014 Miami Heat with Wade bein’ a train wreck all season and missin’ God knows how many games and Bosh disappearin’ on a boy in the Finals for two entire games. That ain’t on LeBron! He averaged 28 points, 8 rebounds and 4 assists in that series playa. Boyz didn’t ever just disappear on Jordan! Nor did Jordan ever have to CARRY a bunch a duns into battle.

Now he’s literally pulled off the impossible and showed up to the Finals this year without Kevin Love and only havin’ Kryie to close out Atlanta (which he didn’t need) and Game 1 in the Finals but not in overtime. He’s out there with the Cosby Kids and puts up 44 points, 8 rebounds and 6 assists! He almost single handedly pulls off the upset on the road against the best team in the league in the FINALS and all boyz could say in the barber shop yesterday was “He could have scored more points” and “Jordan would have finished them boyz off.”

What they don’t understand is that Jordan would never have been in that situation because Jordan couldn’t get out of the first round until he got Scottie Pippen. Stop tellin’ me what Jordan would have been able to do in that situation because he’s already shown us what he would do in that situation. With a bunch of bums around him he would have been on vacation two months ago. Stop it! You sound crazy!

Boyz are so caught up in the “Jordan Brand” that they can’t see the greatness in this player even in the mist of havin’ a terrible supportin’ cast. Nobody ever talks about Magic’s Lakers gettin’ swept twice in ’83 and ’89 when boyz showed up snake bitten. In ’83 Norm Nixon, James Worthy and Bob McAdoo were sidelined when the Sixers ran through them. Then in ’89 the Pistons got at them when both Magic and Byron Scott were out. It happens bruh! Jordan’s Bulls just happened to show up healthy every time they were in the Finals.

Just because a boy loses in the Finals doesn’t mean that he isn’t the best all-around player we’ve ever seen. Look what he’s been bringin’ to the Ship bruh! He should have won at least three in Miami. No excuses for a boy in 2011. Can’t get away from that one. Sorry LeBron! Can’t help you on that one pimpin’! But in his defense I will say that he was just 26 years old and Jordan never sniffed a Finals until he was 28. Maturity has its advantages playa but even at 26 Jordan was a killer. So LeBron you’re on your own on that one baby boy. However, the other two losses weren’t on his ability or inability to be great.

Hey LeBron, I got some rabbit’s feet in my trunk if you need some bruh because you’re gonna need them if you think that rest of those duns in that locker room are gonna step their games up enough to win 4 games without Kyrie. As a matter of fact, I’ve got some live rabbits that I can put in the locker room and in the hotel for you duns because you’re gonna need it. No way can LeBron score 44+ points a night and log 46 minutes with all of those duns on his back. Not gonna happen bruh! The simple fact that he’s doin’ what he’s doin’ makes a strong case for him bein’ the best all-around player we’ve ever seen but Jordan fans aren’t ever gonna cut him a break. 

All of the great players that boyz bring up walked into great situations! Kobe was drafted by Charlotte and immediately traded to the Lakers where he had Phil and Shaq! Larry Bird was drafted by the Celtics and a year later got Kevin McHale and Robert Parrish. Magic went straight to the Lakers where Kareem was waitin’ on him after already winnin’ a title with the Big O in Milwaukee and the great Michael Jordan couldn’t get out of the first round until Scottie showed up 3 years later and Phil rang the door bell in 5 years. Within 7 they were rollin’ with the best supportin’ cast in basketball but LeBron can’t get any respect from boyz out here and he’s draggin’ boyz to the Finals darn near every year by himself! He spent 7 years in Cleveland without gettin’ a savior like the rest of these duns were blessed to get. So let’s see Jordan go 6-0 without Scottie. Oh and did I mention that LeBron has been out here for 12 years without a coach? Shakin’ my head and stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:

1) Hooptie: noun – an old raggedy car that boyz typically put rims on and spend a fortune in audio to look like a complete idiot drivin’. Not because it raggedy but because they spent the bread to rim it up and put sounds in it instead of buyin’ a better car or fixin’ the joint with the money.
2) Crazy Hot Joint: noun – a column or article that in my Jay Graves voice, “Is so good that it’s crazy!” It’s outstandin’ because of the research and time it took to pull the information together. Big shout to Jason McIntyre for doin’ work on that joint!
3) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc.
4) Ship: noun – short for Championship
5) Pimpin’: noun – the person that I’m passionately tryin’ to get my point across to. 
The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!