The Jay Graves Report

Why J.R. Smith wasn’t lyin’ about LeBron bein’ the REAL MVP! “Speak On It!”

"These boyz out here know bruh!"

As I’m standin’ outside the “Brown Bag” joint waitin’ for my Polish and fries I overhear these three cats arguin’ about reality. Albert Einstein says, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.” Warren Bennis, the well-known organizational consultant, jumps out of the ride and says, “Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality.” Then Max De Pree, the famous businessman and writer, cocked him brim, put his square out and said, “The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.”

Well playas…ole boy said it all when he spit that fire! The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. Everybody and their momma’s momma have been arguin’ about who the MVP is based upon boyz puttin’ up ridiculous numbers. More than a month ago I told boyz that LeBron should be the MVP. Then Sekou Smith from NBA.com was a guest on the radio show that I co-host on ESPN’s 1070TheFan called the Barber Shop said the same thing.

Because all of these other cats are goin’ nuts over the fact that the Beard, Steph and Young Russ are puttin’ up crazy numbers you sound stupid sittin’ around arguin’ LeBron with a bunch of cats that don’t understand what the words MOST VALUABLE mean.

Then finally somebody on the inside lookin’ at this thing says what myself and Sekou have been sayin’ all along. J.R. Smith told duns on Monday night that LeBron was the real MVP for all the reasons that we’ve been tryin’ to get boyz to understand.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! In order to understand what the Most Valuable Player is we’ve got to first define the freakin’ word in sequence. Most; meanin’ the greatest quantity, amount, measure, degree or number! For all of you simple minded individuals that means you can’t put anything above it. Valuable means a thing that is of great worth. Player is the dun participatin’ in the athletic event. So if we’re talkin’ about the MOST VALUABLE PLAYER, then we’re talkin’ about the dun that is of greatest measure and worth to his team! If the goal in team sports is to win, then the MOST VALUABLE PLAYER puts the team in a position win more often than not and if he is NOT there they don’t or won’t.

So if LeBron goes to Cleveland and they suddenly become one of the best teams in the league in 2003 and then he leaves in 2010 and suddenly become hot garbage we’re startin’ to understand what MOST VALUABLE smells like. Then all of a sudden he leaves Miami, a team that he led to the Finals Four years in a row winnin’ two Ships and they don’t even make the playoffs. However, the duns he came back home to play for, who hasn’t made the playoffs since he left, are now the 2nd seed in the Eastern Conference.

Sure, you’ll say that the players are different because some cats followed him to Cleveland etc. They picked up J.R. Smith and Iman Shumpert. He’s got Kyrie and Kevin Love so he should be winnin’!’ Well let me ask you this playa? What was J.R. and Iman doin’ a few months ago? Wanderin’ around the wilderness jackin’ up shots for the sake of jackin’ up shots. What was Kyrie doin’ this time last year playa? Makin’ Uncle Drew commercials and losin’! What was Kevin Love doin’ in Minnesota bruh? Puttin’ up crazy numbers gettin’ his head beat in and never makin’ the freakin’ playoffs.

Here’s my idiot gain, “Well what about the cats that followed him up to Cleveland?” Oh you’re talkin’ about Mike Miller and James Jones that get about as much PT as I do for the Cavs bruh? They’re smart because they can play a few minutes a night, knock down some shots and win. They see the value in hangin’ out with a dun that makes other players better.

J.R. Smith is playin’ team basketball for the first time in his freakin’ life! LeBron should get the MVP for that alone. Are you kiddin’ me? But boyz see Young Russ throwin’ up 43 shot attempts in a loss and have the nerve to mention his name in the same breath as LeBron’s.

Miami went to the promise land four years in a row with this cat and now they’re sittin’ at the crib watchin’ the playoffs. Michael Jordan, The G.O.A.T. himself, wasn’t even as valuable when he left the Bulls the first time to play baseball. The team pretty much remained in tack and they not only made the playoffs but they went to the Eastern Conference semifinals in 1994 before losin’ to the Knicks. They won 55 regular games without him! They won 57 the year before with him bruh! Stop it!!! Granted they won the Ship with him but they were still a VERY good team without him. Both the Cavs and the Heat are traaaaaaashhhhh without LeBron! That’s the true definition of an MVP!

The Heat was like the Beatles this time last year when they rolled into arenas. It was nuts because I was there to see them show up in Indianapolis every time they played the Pacers. I wasn’t standin’ outside playa I was on the inside watchin’ this foolishness take place. You would think that the Rolling Stones or freakin’ Michael Jackson’s bus was pullin’ in. 

Now the Heat is pullin’ up in a Winnebago ridin’ on the spare with a busted headlight and Johnny Kemp or Color Me Bad was jumpin’ out of that joint. Nobody was checkin’ for the Heat even before Bosh went down. Boyz are walkin’ past the Heat without recognizin’ them like duns do Kool Moe Dee without his sunglasses.

MOST VALABLE is measured by the impact that one player has on a TEAM. Not the dun that is scorin’ the most points pimpin’! Cleveland was one of the worst teams in the league last year and now they are one of the best and Miami is singin’ for change this year. Need I say more? Max De Pree already told you that the first responsibility of a leader is to define reality and reality is the Heat is trash without LeBron and the Cavs are a contender with him. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:

1) Brown Bag: noun – hood carry out joint. It’s called the Brown Bag because all food is put in a brown paper bag.
2) Ride: noun – car, for all you simple minded individuals
3) Brim: noun – to lean your hat to either the left or the right to show gang affiliation
4) Ole boy: noun – the person in question, dude, guy , etc.
5) Fire: noun – important information, wisdom that the old timers normally give a boy at the barber shop or the car wash.
6) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc.