The Jay Graves Report

Washington pulls a Players Club Bernie Mac blastin’ Colorado! “T-R-O-U-B-L-E!”

"Aw, it's on now playa!"

Robert H. Schuller, the pastor and motivational speaker, once said, “Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines.” Albert Einstein broke it down like this, “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” Then Alfred H. Montapert, the author, shut the buildin’ down when spit, “Expect problems and eat them for breakfast.”

Well playas…the College Football Playoff Committee didn’t expect Washington to show up in the PAC-12 Championship Game and completely beat the brakes off of Colorado 41-10! And neither did I! Now they’ve got a serious problem on their hands. All season long boyz have been lookin’ at the Huskies with the stink eye waitin’ for them to fall apart but they keep hangin’ around. With a PAC-12 Championship under their belts, in my Bernie Mac “Players Club” voice, “It’s gone be T-R-O-U-B-L-E! T-R-O-U-B-L-E!”

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Everybody and their baby’s momma’s momma, Ms. Jackson, wants to see both Ohio State and Michigan in the playoff. Boyz are already on these dull shows hollerin’ about Ohio State bein’ a lock and they have Michigan sittin’ in the cat bird seat at No.5 just waitin’ for Washington to take the “L” so they could slide up. Well pimpin’, that didn’t happen on Friday night!

Now we’ve got a problem for the duns that were lookin’ to get both Ohio State and Michigan into the joint! And while you’re playin’, boyz better hope that Wisconsin wins the Big Ten Championship Game Saturday night because that’s the only way, in my opinion, that you can justify puttin’ Ohio State in. Why? Because Penn State beat Ohio State heads up and they’ll have the Big Ten title to go with it. That would be a hard out for boyz to diss Penn State and put Ohio State in with a head to head win against them and a Big Ten title in their pockets.

Now I’ve picked Wisconsin to win the Big Ten over Penn State but it could be problems if the Nittany Lions show up playboy.

“T-R-O-U-B-L-E! T-R-O-U-B-L-E!!!”

Think about it bruh! Bama’s in whether they win or lose the SEC Title Game because they’re so far ahead of the curve it’s ridiculous! They’re the only undefeated team still alive in the Power 5 Conferences. So even if they lose they wouldn’t fall out of the top 4. Washington is in bruh regardless of how much boyz don’t like them. Why? Because they’re the PAC-12 Champs with only one loss!!

So now boyz better hope that both Penn State and Clemson loses in order to get both Ohio State and Michigan in. I don’t see Virginia Tech showin’ up and beatin’ Clemson so they’re good. So guess what playa? Boyz better push all of their chips to the middle of the table on Wisconsin winnin’ the Big Ten. Because if Penn State goes into Lucas Oil Stadium and blasts Wisconsin you can call it Christmas on Ohio State gettin’ in. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

3) Ms. Jackson: noun – rap song by the super group OutKast

4) Players Club: noun – movie where Bernie Mac plays a the owner of the strip club that owes a boy money and says it’s goin’ to be trouble if a boy comes looking for him.

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!