The Jay Graves Report

Texas needs to worry about not gettin’ embarrassed on Saturday instead of who won the Rose Bowl!

Yeah grown folks remember this but the duns you're recruitin' today don't!

Anybody that has been watchin’ college sports for more than two days knows that the NCAA is butt backwards and that’s the edited version. Whenever a boy gets into trouble or more specifically violates one of their stupid rules of “amateurism” they run in and start pullin’ banners down and vacatin’ wins. They even vacate losses too which makes no sense because everybody and their baby’s momma already saw the darn games and the duns that played in them have rings and memories to prove that it actually happened.

So fastforward to this week. Everybody in Texas wearin’ burnt orange is up in arms because the USC media guide shows the Trojans bein’ 4-0 all-time against the Longhorns when in reality they’re 4-1. Texas won the 2005 national title after beatin’ USC in the 2006 Rose Bowl which in my opinion was the greatest college football game ever played. Vince Young, who was screwed out of the Heisman Trophy that year, put the Longhorns on his back and beat the Matt Leinart and Reggie Bush led Trojans.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Accordin’ to the silly NCAA rules, USC has to act like the 2005 season never existed when they write this foolishness up because of the Reggie Bush infractions. Not only do they have to vacate the wins of that season but they have to vacate the losses too. So in the official record book the 2005 season shows a 0-0 record. How stupid is that bruh? Again, everybody and their Uncle Junior saw them play every down that season and lose to Texas in the Rose Bowl.

Just like everybody saw the Fab 5 from Michigan lose the national title to Duke but the NCAA tells a boy in Ann Arbor none of it ever happened.

What’s even more crazy is that they tell USC that it didn’t happen but tell Texas that it did. Accordin’ to the record books Texas won the national title by beatin’ USC but USC didn’t even play the darn game if you ask the NCAA.

So with the anticipation of Saturday’s ball game out in LA between Texas and USC the Longhorn fans want there props for beatin’ the Trojans that year on paper not just in memory. Well playas…if I were you I wouldn’t be worried about them acknowledging’ your win in 2005. You better be worried about the thrashin’ you’re about to take on national television in 2017 especially after you gave up 51 points to dull Maryland at the crib.

Why? Because every dun you’re tryin’ to recruit today hadn’t even started school yet when you won that freakin’ game. So they can’t remember Texas winnin’ jack squat. The only thing that’s relevant today is you not gettin’ the dog snot beaten out of you in front of Big Momma and convincin’ Bevo to put on his horns and showin’ up. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo is real talk today!