Portland rolls over the Pacers in a ’79 Impala with a gangsta rag top! “Welcome to the NBA”

CJ McMullom goes to work on the Pacers and drops 28 on a boy as the Trailblazers win 114-96. Photo: Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports

On Wednesday, openin’ night for the Pacers, they pulled up in a Big Body Chevy like some straight up G’s and jumped all over the dull Brooklyn Nets 140-131. Everybody and their baby’s momma hit a lick and went to the crib with some confidence. Then on Friday night reality set in that they were still playin’ in the NBA. The Portland Trailblazers rolled into town with a back court that hadn’t watched TV on Wednesday night playa. They jumped out of the ’79 Impala with a rag top and put that thang on the Pacers 114-96.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! It was great to see that the Pacers weren’t as bad as the Nets on Day One because it takes the guess work out of it but it means absolutely nothin’. Indiana were without their newly named captain, Myles Turner, who was out with a concussion and a sore neck and it showed big time. The Trailblazers out-rebounded the Pacers 51-39 allowin’ Al-Farouq Aminu to look like a darn Hall of Famer as he finished with 16 points and 16 rebounds. NUTS!!!

Like I said earlier, the Portland back court brought their lunch and took everybody else’s too. C.J. McCollum finished with 28 points and 7 assists. While Damian Lillard popped off another 18 points and 7 assists. As a team they shot 48 percent from the field and 47 percent from three. They couldn’t shoot free throws knockin’ only 76 percent of those joints down.

 

However, they played hella defense on the other end limitin’ the Pacers output especially from three point range. Indiana shot 44 percent from the field but only managed 22 percent from three and they were a horrendous 66 percent from the foul line. Wheredeydodatat? Boyz don’t even play defense on free throws bruh!! How do you shoot 66 percent from there?

Victor Oladipo jumped out of the Chevy with 17 points but the most impressive Pacer of the night was the young boy T.J. Leaf!! He finished with 17 points out of the bushes and was crazy aggressive with the rock. If there were any positives for the Pacers he was it. The homie Lance Stephenson, that I call the Don Dada, couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn in a semi truck on Friday night bruh. As a matter of fact, he couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat. That dun was 1 of 5 and finished with 4 points.

Well playas…welcome to the NBA. I wish a boy could have played Brooklyn every night but it doesn’t work that way. Now it’s time to earn that check! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Big Body Chevy: noun – 1985-90 model Chevy Impala

2) G’s: noun – gangstas

3) Hit a lick: to get money on a come up.

4) Crib: noun – home

5) Rag Top: noun – cloth roof of a car

6) Out of the bushes: verb phrase – to come off of the bench.

7) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk!