The Jay Graves Report

Pacers finally give away the Bentley in Philly! “Hittin’ Licks”

Oh, it's mine now bruh! You left the keys in it playa!"

The same three cats that were standin’ out in front of Banker’s Life Fieldhouse on Wednesday night arguin’ were havin’ the same dull argument on Friday night in Philly! Bertrand Russell, British philosopher, took a bite out of his cheese steak and said, “In all affairs it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.” Paula Abdul, the former Lakers dancer, shouted from Independence Hall, “Your talent is your art. It is not to be taken for granted.” Then Dr. Joyce Brothers pulled up bumpin’ some Roots with Quest Love killin’ the drums and spit, “Being taken for granted can be a compliment. It means that you’ve become a comfortable, trusted element in another person’s life.”

Well playas…the Indiana Pacers didn’t learn a thing this past Wednesday night when they took the dull Philadelphia 76ers for granted and almost gave the Bentley away because they didn’t turn the joint off, lock the doors and take the keys out of it when they went in the crib. On Friday night they decided to go out to Philly to test the foolishness and got beat in overtime 109-105.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Like Big Momma would always say, “They didn’t believe that fat meat was greasy!” So what did they do? They pulled up in Philly blastin’ the music, talkin’ loud with all the windows down, wearin’ loud colors!! Then after ridin’ through the hood all evenin’ lettin’ a boy know that they were in town. They went into some dun’s crib in the worst part of town and left the car runnin’ and the doors unlocked with a sign on the joint that read, “Take me please!! I left it out on Wednesday night but you guys couldn’t get out of town with it. So PLEASE TAKE IT TONIGHT!! I beg of you!” 

The crazy thing about this foolishness is that earlier on in the 2nd quarter the Pacers were goin’ to work on these boyz! It initially looked like they would just blast them and go on back to the crib. But noooo my brother! After havin’ them on the ropes bleedin’ from the mouth they pulled a Denny Greene and “let ‘um off of the hook!”

Now how do you near miss a boy at home and then two nights later go to his crib and get caught? Knowin’ that these cats are lookin’ to hit a lick! They haven’t won a game all year bruh! So you know they were waitin’ on a boy to fall asleep at the wheel. You just can’t be the dun that does it. Especially when they almost took your whip in Indy earlier this week.

Despite Paul George’s 26 points and 9 rebounds and Monta Ellis comin’ off of the bench with 19 points, 6 rebounds, 5 assists and 4 steals they couldn’t keep a boy from jumpin’ in the ride and pullin’ off. So dull!!!

You already know that when they walked back in the crib Big Momma was waitin’ for them with her famous speech! “At some point you gone start listenin’ to me baby. But until then you gone keep gettin’ burned. I can’t help ya no mo!”  Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dull: adjective – to describe something as bein’ terrible, something that makes you sick with disgust because it’s so stupid to even think of.

2) Spit: verb – to say

3) Roots: noun – rap group from Philly and Quest Love is the drummer

4) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

5) Hit a lick: verb phrase – to catch a boy not payin’ attention and rob him for profit

5) Whip: noun – luxury vehicle

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!