The Jay Graves Report

LSU pulls a Five Heartbeats on the Mad Hatter! “Ole Eddie Kane Jr.”

"You believe this bruh?"

Dalai Lama once said, “In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher.” Robert Green Ingersoll broke it down like this, “Tolerance is giving to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.” Then George Eliot put it where the goats could get it when he spit, “The responsibility of tolerance lies with those who have the wider vision.”

Well playas…the responsibility of tolerance lies with the duns callin’ the shots at LSU in the athletic department. On Sunday boyz down in Baton Rouge announced that they had fired the Mad Hatter, Les Miles, for startin’ the season 2-2 after a dull loss to Auburn on Saturday and Wisconsin in the season opener. They pushed Cam Cameron, the offensive coordinator, out of the limo like ole Eddie Kane Jr. too. As a result of all of this foolishness, they promoted the defensive line coach, Ed Orgeron to interim head coach.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Everybody and their baby’s momma’s momma, Ms. Jackson, knew that ole Les was on a short leash. They were ready to hang him up side down like Big Red from the movie the Five Heartbeats last season after he lost 3 straight. “My office hours are from 9 to 5!” 

What’s so crazy is that a boy can go from bein’ the man to the cottage cheese just like that. It’s Janet Jackson up in this piece. “What have you done for me lately?” Do you realize that Les was the winningest coach in school history bruh? He’s got a better winnin’ percentage than Nick Saban at LSU. Les won 77 percent of his game with a record of 114-34!!! And Nick Saban won 75 percent of his with a record of 48-16.

Is it fair that a boy losses his job after a goin’ 9-3 last year and startin’ this season off 2-2? Yes!!! If you’re coachin’ at LSU or any powerhouse in the south with expectations of competin’ for a national title annually. This an’t Indiana or Purdue bruh! This ain’t Arizona or even Michigan State. This is a football school that expects to be in the hunt every year. Unfortunately, that’s the pressure that comes with takin’ a job at a program like that.

I’ll tell you what bruh! Bob Stoops better watch his back too. Boyz aren’t playin’ out here and they wanna win too! So keep ya head on a swivel because ole Les won’t be the only dun lookin’ for a job come December. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

3) Put it where the goats can get it: verb phrase – to make it as elementary as possible. To put it at ground level so everyone can understand it.

4) Ms. Jackson: noun – rap song by the super group OutKast