The Jay Graves Report

Louisville finally soils the mattress in Houston! “And Down Goes Frazier!”

"Welcome to the my world playboy!"

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, the 18th century German writer, once said, “Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for changes.” George Washington gave it to us like this, “To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.” Then Robert Baden-Powell, the British Army officer, spit some real knowledge at a boy when he said, “Be Prepared… the meaning of the motto is that a scout must prepare himself by previous thinking out and practicing how to act on any accident or emergency so that he is never taken by surprise.”

Well playas…the University of Louisville obviously didn’t prepare themselves by previously thinkin’ out and practicin’ how to act on any accident or emergency because they were completely taken by surprise down in Houston on Thursday night. The Cougars wasted no time beatin’ the brakes off of them 36-10 to send them back to Big Momma’s cryin’! The joint was over from the word go!

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! At some point you boyz are goin’ to start listenin’ to me! I said in my “College Football Weekly Preview: Week 12!” early Thursday mornin’ that Louisville was goin’ to wet the bed because they’ve been drippin’ in their underwear for the past few weeks. Everybody and their baby’s momma’s momma, Ms. Jackson, wanted to see Lamar Jackson in the Final 4 but I told you that this wasn’t a reality TV show bruh! It’s college football!!!

In order to get in you’ve got to be one of the top 4 teams in America and they were boxed out even if they’d won at Houston!! Why? Because they had already lost the head to head with Clemson! So unless Clemson had fallen apart again they had no shot!! But I told you that they would get beat in Houston because they weren’t as good as everybody wanted them to be.

Louisville needed a 34 point fourth quarter effort to beat dull Wake Forest a week ago and they barely got past Duke a few weeks prior to that!! So I knew they didn’t have what it took to go on the road and beat a though Houston squad. Why? Because they only had one cat to defend!!! Can you name anybody else on that roster bruh? Just one cat?

On the openin’ kick off when the dun fumbled the rock I texted my boy and said, “Here we go! They’re about to completely soil the mattress because they, in the famous words of Mike Tyson, “had a plan until they got hit in the mouth.” That dun was rollin’ all over the ground holdin’ his hand because he fumbled. Even if it was legitimately broken there was nothin’ wrong with his legs to walk off of the field. The fact that he laid on the ground and wouldn’t get up because his “hand” was hurt told you everything you needed to know about Louisville. In other words playboy, they ain’t ready!

ville

I feel bad for Lamar Jackson because he’s out there by himself! Football is the ultimate TEAM sport. You can’t win by carryin’ the whole team. At some point it becomes too much to handle and too easy to defend. All Houston did was jail break pass rush a boy all night and forced him to either get rid of the ball in a hurry or make another dun make a play. There were no other duns! Why? Because they are no other duns! Lamar Jackson is Louisville!!

Let this be a lesson to all of you cats that fall in love with a team because they’ve got one cat. This ain’t track and field or hoop. One cat can carry a team all the way to the promise land because football is the ultimate TEAM sport. Lamar Jackson can’t beat legitimate teams all by himself. So say it with me, “And down goes Frazier!”  So we don’t have to here about Louisville again until next year. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say , to enlighten

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.