The Jay Graves Report

Kobe over Draymond ONLY because it’s called the All-Star and not the Best Player Game! “Foolishness”

"Y'all didn't know?"

Maxwell Maltz, the well-known cosmetic surgeon, once said, “Accept yourself as you are. Otherwise you will never see opportunity. You will not feel free to move toward it; you will feel you are not deserving.” The big homie, William Shakespeare, gave it to us like this, “Reputation is an idle and most false imposition; oft got without merit, and lost without deserving.” Then Aristotle broke it down like a playa and a pimp convention wearin’ a pair of Detroit gators pushin’ a Caddy bumpin’ some Outkast when he spit, “Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in deserving them.” 

Well playas…the Black Mamba’s dignity does not consist in possessin’ honors but in deservin’ them! That’s why the dun was just voted to his 18th All-Star game! More than 1.9 million fans voted for him to be a starter in the upcomin’ All-Star Game in Toronto! So with that bein’ said he’ll join Steph, Young Russ, KD and ole dusty braids Kawhi in the startin’ line up for the West. Will somebody please go get Keesha or LaQuisha to oil and braid that dun’s hair!! He’s a freakin’ millionaire and every time you see him he looks like Lil’ Mike from the projects by the head. They stopped wearin’ cornrows 10 years ago! And while you’ve got Keesha nem there grab RGIII and cut his hair too.  C’mon bruh!!!

The East starters are LeBron, PG13, Melo, Kyle Lowery and D. Wade! 

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! It’s the freakin’ All-Star game playa!  It’s a popularity contest! This has nothin’ to do with who’s the best or who the better players are right now. The fans are votin’ for this foolishness so that’s why Kobe “deserves” to be a starter. If 1.9 million people wanna see that dun play then it is what it is. Fans 90 percent of the time don’t even know the game. They just know what they like. Because any sucka that thinks Kobe should even be in Toronto All-Star Weekend on ability alone is insane!!! But it’s not the All-Pro team pimpin’! It’s the All-Star Game and is an all-star! 

I hear you cats out in Oakland screamin’ from the roof tops, “Where’s Draymond bruh? He’s deserves to start ahead of Kobe! Are you serious?” Yes playboy! I’m dead serious!!! Day-Day ain’t the Black Mamba in the fans eyes! It’s the All-Star Game! Not the BEST PLAYER GAME!!! If it were, Kobe would need ID just to come in and watch the joint but this ain’t that playa. 

I mean duns like D. Wade and Melo shouldn’t be startin’ either but they are! Why? Because the fans voted for them. Jimmy Butler and Andre Drummond are ballin’ and their teams are havin’ better seasons but again, this ain’t that. Take it for what it is and move on. 

You boyz are actin’ like you don’t remember when Yao Ming was startin’ ahead of Shaq in the joint years ago.  Jeremy Lin would have made the joint if his name would have been on the ballot in time the year he was “Linsanity” goin’ nuts for two weeks in New York. Heck, Magic Johnson made the All-Star team and he wasn’t even in the darn NBA!! And that’s the edited version. C’mon bruh! You already know that they’re gonna parade Kobe around the league this year and then drop him off like ole Eddie Cain in April. So let it be what its gonna be and then everybody can move on from this foolishness. Just don’t put that dun on the Olympic team. We’re cool as long as a boy doesn’t jump off of the deep end and do that. Because then we’d have a serious problem. Stop me when I start lyin’! 

Playas Thesaurus: 

1)  Detroit gators: noun – a pair of alligator shoes bruh. Boyz in Detroit are famous for rockin’ them. 

2) Spit: verb – to say

3) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

4) Nem: pronoun – ghetto term for “Them”

5) Pimpin’: noun – the person that I’m passionately tryin’ to gat my point across to. 

6) Day-Day: noun – that Draymond’s nickname playa