The Jay Graves Report

Jim Irsay made a fool of himself even tryin’ to holler at Jon Gruden! “What?”

"You want me to do what?"

After the season was over a few weeks ago it took Jim Irsay, owner of the Indianapolis Colts, about 4 or 5 days to announce that he’d be bringin’ Chuck Pagano back for his 6th season as his head coach. Well it finally fell out of the closet over this past weekend that ole boy was tryin’ to holler at ESPN’s Jon Gruden about takin’ over as the head coach. When boyz asked Gruden about it he said, “I know nothing. I’ve told people I’m not coaching. I’m a broadcaster. I’m not a coach.” 

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Jon Gruden is tryin’ to be nice and humble out here with you boyz. He’s tryin’ NOT to keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st bruh! My mans and nem said that he’s not interested in part because of the coachin’ restrictions of the NFL’s collective bargaining agreement.

Well…I’m not him so I’ll tell you the truth. Why on earth would Jon Gruden take a job as a head coach of ANY team bruh? It makes no sense!!!

He’s the HIGHEST paid on air personality at ESPN!! He makes $6.5 million talkin’ about something that he can do with his eyes closed butt naked foamin’ at the mouth in his backyard once a week!!! The highest paid coaches in the NFL, Pete Carroll and Sean Payton, make $8 million per year. The next set of cats, Bill Belichick and Andy Reid, make a cool $7 million! They all have to work 18 or 19 hour days and deal with the pressure of winnin’ games every week.

Jon Gruden is makin’ $6.5 million essentially workin’ one day a week with absolutely no pressure to win anything. Yes, I realize that he’s got to prepare for the games on Monday Night but he’s literally talkin’ his way through the joint because he’s already an expert on the subject. And he’s already won a Super Bowl!! So even if he’s talkin’ crazy and makin’ no sense, people will take his word for it because he’s a former coach with a Super Bowl ring on his finger.

So why on earth would he take a job as a coach ever again? He’s makin’ more bread that 90 percent of the duns coachin’ in the league and he’s got his feet in the air right now!!! His season in over!! Monday Night Football ended with the regular season. Jim Irsay was completely wastin’ his time even callin’ that dun. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) My mans and nem: noun – credible sources in the street or close to the situation.

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!