The Jay Graves Report

How Zeke Elliott set his OWN self up for failure! “Famous”

“Man I just play ball bruh! Now this foolishness!”

Galileo Galilei once said, “I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.” Voltaire gave it to like this, “Common sense is not so common.” Then the big homie, “Thomas Edison, put it where the goats could get it when he spit, “The three great essentials to achieve anything worth while are: Hard work, Stick-to-itiveness, and Common sense.” 

Well playas…Ezekiel Elliott checked the box on hard work and stick-to-itiveness but the dun slid right over the common sense joint. Over the weekend some chick named Tiffany Thompson accused this dun of domestic violence. She’s got bruises all over her etc. Now the Columbus Police has referred the joint over to the Columbus City Attorney’s office because they couldn’t get a straight story from anybody involved in this foolishness. He’s sayin’ one thing, she’s sayin’ something else and the witnesses need a “Coke and a Smile” because didn’t see anything. Accordin’ to him she was in a bar fight and that’s how she go the bruises etc. Now if boyz find that he’s guilty then he SHOULD GO TO JAIL!! No ifs, ands or buts about it. NO MAN SHOULD PUT HIS HANDS ON A WOMAN!!! You gotta walk away playboy because you’re not gonna win that fight. No sirrrr! However, ole boy hasn’t been charged or arrested as of yet. 

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! I don’t know what happened playboy because I wasn’t in the ride but what I do know is that I know his daddy has given him the speech! “Leave these thirsty chicks alone!!! Because they’ll get you in trouble EVERY time!!!”  We’ve all heard it!!! 

This time last week they were talkin’ about how Zeke’s Cowboy jersey was the highest sellin’ joint in the NFL and he hasn’t even been to trainin’ camp yet. Now this dun is lookin’ like Ray Rice’s little brother and Ed Hardy’s next door neighbor! Now I’m not sayin’ that the dun is guilty but what I am sayin’ is, “Why are you dealin’ with this type of foolishness and you’re about to start your professional career this week?” 

Now accordin’ to reports ole boy was supposedly tryin’ to break up with ole girl, she tripped and told him that if he did that she would ruin him. He’s allegedly got text messages on his phone that will prove all of this accordin’ to a Cowboy front office executive accordin’ to his tweet. Again, I don’t know what’s true bruh but what I DO know is that his butt should have been in Dallas already instead of foolin’ around in Columbus with some chick that was tellin’ you who she is. 

“C’mon bruh! Where you from?”

Anytime a woman is up at night takin’ pictures of YOU while YOU’RE sleep and postin’ them on Snapchat without YOUR knowledge, she can’t be trusted. Ole girl not only posted the joint but put a caption under it that read, “Dallas Cowboys newest running back Ezekiel Eliott!” SHE WAS TRYIN’ TO GET FAMOUS BRUH!!!! That was back in May! So I’ll ask the first and only question that the O’G.’s want to know!!! Why are you still dealin’ with her in late July? Why are you payin’ her rent and co-signin’ rides for her? C’mon!!! Where you from? She already told you who she was! So “if” she did say that she would ruin you. You gotta believe her at some point. 

You’re about to embark on a career in the NFL and you’ve got this type of foolishness followin’ you into the league!!! Again bruh, I wasn’t there! So I don’t know what happened in that ride. But why are you still dealin’ with a chick that told you three months ago that she was tryin’ to get famous off of you. Now SHE’S FAMOUS BRUH and you’re lookin’ crazy whether you’re innocent or not. When people tell you who they are, LISTEN to ‘um!  So “if” you’ve got a temper that YOU can’t control. The last thing YOU need is a woman that’s tryin’ to get famous off of YOU because it’s not gonna end well for YOU!! That’s like an alcoholic goin’ to the bar to play cards with the fellas and promisin’ his wife he’s not gonna drink. 

And the next time you wanna play house DON’T! Let me give you the same advice that I give all of these young boyz out here. “What’s the point of bein’ single if you gotta deal with married man issues? Stop livin’ with these broads that you aren’t married to. Stop payin’ their rent and stop buyin’ them cars and foolishness like that. Once you open yourself up to that foolishness that’s when crazy emotions and arguments jump out of the birthday cake butt naked foamin’ at the mouth and anything can pop off. Why? Because when you start buyin’ her everything and payin’ her bills you think you own her. So when she starts talkin’ slick you can’t believe that you’ve just put your hands on her. If you simply dated her and had your OWN place when the emotions jump out of the closet and a boy wants to fight and argue. You simply put on your shoes and go to your OWN house. Then you only talk to her when one or both of you calm down or you don’t really ever have to come back.” Now that’s some O.G. wisdom for you there bruh! 

When you start obligatin’ yourself financially to folks that’s when it goes off of the rails. I hope this doesn’t end this dun’s career before it actually starts and you can stop me when I start lyin’! 

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say 

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific. 

3) Put it where the goats can get it: verb phrase – to make it as elementary as possible. To put it at ground level so everyone can understand it.