The Jay Graves Report

Fake Media-Types start ignorant rumor that Harbaugh would leave Michigan! “Bruh!”

"What!!?" Mandatory Credit: Rick Osentoski-USA TODAY Sports

Mike Tyson once said, “I don’t try to intimidate anybody before a fight. That’s nonsense. I intimidate people by hitting them.” Dr. Seuss gave it to us like this, “I like nonsense; it wakes up the brain cells.” Then Robert Frost, the famous poet, preached a ghetto sermon when he spit, “Forgive me my nonsense, as I also forgive the nonsense of those that think they talk sense.”

Well playas…some of these fake media-types just start talkin’ for the sake of talkin’ because they’ve got nothin’ else to do. After ole dull Jeff Fisher got canned from the Rams. These duns start hollerin’ about how Jim Harbaugh could be the next head coach out there and then started askin’ what it would take for him to leave? Then the rumors start flyin’ around like flies at a ghetto cookout.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! How stupid does Jim Harbaugh leavin’ Michigan sound to go to the darn Rams or to go back to the NFL for that matter? It’s sounds as dumb as the dun that started the freakin’ rumor!!!

Bruh…Harbaugh left the 49ers because he wanted to control every aspect of the organization and he couldn’t. He clashed with the front office because they’ve got duns doin’ the jobs that he wanted to control like buyin’ the groceries etc. He’s now at Michigan where he’s the darn CEO, president, GM and the official grocery shopper. Sure, he’s got other duns actually makin’ the runs to the store but they can’t buy anything without his approval. He’s got complete autonomy to do whatever he wants to do in Ann Arbor.

Did I mention that he’s makin’ $9 million per year to do it. He’s already makin’ more bread than any head coach in the NFL right now!!! And he’s runnin’ the ENTIRE show!!! Sean Peyton and Pete Carroll are at the top of the food chain with salaries of $8M and Bill Belichick is rockin’ a smooth $7.5M!! All three of them have won Super Bowls and the dun with multiple rings that is considered the best to ever to do it is ranked third.

So why do you think that the Rams would pay Jim Harbaugh 3, 4, 5, 6 million more than these cats and he hasn’t won jack squat? So are they gonna hire him and fire the GM, president and CEO? Because if they hire ole boy that’s exactly what they would have to do because he’s not comin’ back to the NFL to argue with boyz about how he wants to run his show. He’s the king at Michigan and he’s gettin’ a king’s ransom to show up everyday. He’s Prince Akeem and King Jaffe Joffer all wrapped up in one bruh!!! He’s got boyz hopping around on one leg barkin’ and you want him to give that up?

Yo!! Fake media-types!! Stop talkin’ about things you know nothin’ about! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Spit: verb – to say

2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

3) Prince Akeem and King Jaffe Joffer: noun – characters in the movie “Coming to America.”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!