The Jay Graves Report

Boyz have lied to you about Jordan long enough and TODAY it has to stop! “The Truth”

C'mon bruh! Let these duns keep believin' this foolishness! I'm tryin' to sell shoes!"

It blows my mind that fully grown men that actually saw Jordan play will act like they don’t remember how terrible the Bulls were before they finally got Phil. I bring this up because boyz will constantly argue that LeBron is takin’ advantage of a weaker East as to the reason why he’s been able to get to 7 Finals so far in his career at only 32 years of age. The dun’s been to six straight and is on his way to his 7th straight this year barin’ injury.

Jordan fans will act like his career started in 1991 when he won his first championship. The dun didn’t just play six seasons bruh. They’ll also tell you that Mike finally got over the hump to win that championship. Well playboy…Mike didn’t get over the hump Mike had to wait until those teams, Boston and Detroit got old and broken up and Magic got sick before it was his turn.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Don’t get selective memory when talkin’ about this cat. Don’t act like Mike was such a beast when he walked into the league because the Bulls were terrible in a terrible East for years after he got there. And they were terrible and couldn’t get out of the first round of the playoffs until Scottie Pippen was drafted in 1987. Oh, keep up with me playas.

Mike’s first year in 1984-85 the Bulls made the freakin’ playoffs as a 7th seed with a record of 38-44!! Think about that bruh!! Not only did they make the playoffs winnin’ 38 games but they were a 7th seed! Obviously they got eliminated in 4 games. Back then they only played the best of 5 series but they were a 7th seed winnin’ 38 games!!!

The followin’ year Mike broke his foot and missed 64 games but the Bulls still made the playoffs with a record of 30-52!!! Who makes the playoffs these days winnin’ 30 games bruh. Let’s put that into perspective. That’s like the Knicks makin’ the playoffs today with their 31 wins. The Bulls got swept that year by the Celtics.

They got swept again in 1986-87 by the Celtics after makin’ the playoffs as an 8th seed winnin’ 40 games. My point here is this, stop lyin’ to folks about LeBron takin’ advantage of a weaker East when the East was even worse when Mike was playin’ and couldn’t get to the Finals. Ole boy didn’t get out of the first round of the playoffs until Scottie showed up and he didn’t win a title until it was his turn.

The Pistons team finally started to go south when they got rid of Rick Mahorn in 1989 and Larry Bird started havin’ back problems which eventually forced him into retirement in 1992. Mike won his first championship in 1991 against the Lakers right? What month and year did Magic announce that he would be retirin’ from the league due to his illness? June of 1991!!! When were the Finals? June of 1991! So stop lyin’ to folks about Mike gettin’ over the hump. Boyz just happened to get out of his way that were dominatin’ the game at the time.

Everybody and their baby’s momma will tell you that Jordan went 6-0 in the finals and never went to a Game 7 like the dun just started hoopin’ in 1991 and like he was on the floor all by himself like he was runnin’ the 100 meters.

By the time he started winnin’ he had the best coach of all-time. He always had a dead eye shooter in Craig Hodges, B.J. Armstrong, John Paxson and Steve Kerr (best 3-point shootin’ percentage of all-time). He had the best wing man in the game (Scottie) and the best rebounder (Rodman) in the game. Oh, and don’t let me forgot that they traveled the world and brought in the best international player in the world at the time in Tony Kukoc.

Mike played for 14 years in the league between two retirements and he only went to and won 6 Finals. You do the math playboy. That means that for 8 years he didn’t get to the Finals. You can’t act like those years don’t count against his resume. Not gettin’ to the Finals and not gettin’ out of the first round is worse than gettin’ to the Finals and losin’. So therefore, that means that he was 0-8 in in the Finals those years. Why? Because he never showed up to the Finals.

It’s disrespectful to tell brag about Mike goin’ 6-0 in the Finals like that was the biggest accomplishment in Finals history when Bill Russell went 8-0 in the Finals from 1959-1966! That’s eight STRAIGHT bruh!!! He didn’t take a break and win 8. He won 8 straight!! He also won titles in ’57, ’68 and ’69 too. C’mon bruh! If you’re goin’ to go to court and be Jordan’s lawyer at least do your homework.

LeBron’s been in the league for the same 14 years but he’s only 32 years old and he’s been to 7 Finals and won 3 of them. Mike didn’t win 6 championships until he was 36 years old bruh. At 32 Mike had only been to and won 3 Finals. So when you run to the barber shop to tell the story make sure that you’re tellin’ boyz the facts by puttin’ them into perspective.

Stop lyin’ to folks about how good Jordan was between 1984-90 in terms of bein’ a winner. He was ALWAYS a great scorer but he didn’t know how to win until he got Phil and he couldn’t get out of the first round until he got Scottie. If you’re goin’ to tell the story tell it right.

One other thing my dude, when you start braggin’ about Mike havin’ 6 rings (that he didn’t win until he was 36) please understand that that’s middle of the road in terms of duns winnin’ championships in the league. Let me take you to the The Jay Graves School of Basketball Knowledge for a minute. There are 12 cats in the history of the league that have won 6 or more titles. There are 9 with more titles than Mike! Oh you didn’t know that? Why? Because none of these dun’s on TV or radio ever bothered to know the history of the game. Well I don’t talk about things that I don’t know playboy.

Bill Russell’s got 11, Sam Jones 10, John Havlicek 8, Tom Heinsohn 8, K.C. Jones 8, Tom “Satch” Sanders 8, Robert Horry 7, James Loscutoff 7 and Frank Ramsey 7. And please stop actin’ like Pippen, Kareem and Bob Cousey don’t all have the same amount of rings as Jordan.

My point in givin’ you that list is to show you how stupid boyz sound hollerin’ about Mike winnin’ 6 titles. Winnin’ more titles means that you played on the best team because 99.9999 percent of cats readin’ this joint don’t even know who James Loscutoff is.

Dun’s have lied to folks about Jordan long enough and it’s got to stop today. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus: 

1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.

The G is excluded from the endings of all words because the G is near and dear to my heart because I’m from “The G” which is Gary, Indiana. So I only use the G when I’m talkin’ about “The G!”

The caption under the photo isn’t real but its real talk! 


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